There are not many sports in the world where the opportunity to walk the same turf and experience the same crowds in the arena of superbly talented sports people exist – being a golf caddy, however, fits that bill. When the opportunity arose to be on the bag of my good pal and European Challenge Tour Professional, Chris Hanson, I grabbed it with both hands and said “let’s do this!”.Those of you who know Chris probably think of him as the nice family guy with a talent for golf and living the dream. Let me tell you now, having spent a week on his bag and being in his permanent company, there is a lot more to this man than most of you probably perceive.
In this diarised story, I will hopefully be able to get across to you just what hard work and dedication Chris puts into his livelihood, as he not only lives the dream but strives for the top in a sporting world where millimetres and inches are the fine lines between success and failure.
Monday 25 May 2015
I returned home at 8pm from my second game of cricket in 3 days for my beloved Denby Dale CC (not an ideal way for an old, overweight guy to prepare for caddying, I may add!).
The text messages start between Chris and me in preparation for the days ahead, when, at 22.15hrs, this one landed from him!!!!
Reality check number 1 – I need to be up at 3am, shaved, showered and dressed to ensure that I am at Chris’s for 4am – and I haven’t even started packing yet!!!
Tuesday 26 May 2015
Alarm goes off at 3am, as predicted, and uncharacteristically I turned it off and made the fatal mistake that we all sometimes do – “I’ll just have 5 minutes!!”.
Next thing I knew it was 30 minutes later and a mad rush to get sorted! Within 20 minutes I was in the car setting off to pick Chris up and breathing a big sigh of relief – my virgin appearance on the European Challenge Tour could so easily have ended before it had even begun!
It was 4 o’clock on the dot when I arrived at Chris’s, the dark streets and silence broken by the sweet tones of the Lindley clock tower, a local landmark which is as iconic amongst the villagers as the Eiffel tower is in Paris!
A short 30 minute drive and we arrived at Leeds/Bradford airport, a journey that was broken up only by a few early morning grunts between the two of us.
Chris had arranged a “meet and greet” service at the airport; however, when we arrived there was no meet and definitely no greet!! A quick phone call was followed by the arrival of the employee, who issued our first rollicking of the tour – we were parked in the wrong area and as such had to pay £6 for the privilege of letting him drive away in my car!
Once inside the terminal, it was remarkably busy with stag and hen parties in fancy dress waiting to embark on a trip fuelled by fun, alcohol and other adult misdemeanours!! After queuing for a while at check in, it got to our turn and we became that couple that we all tut and sigh at when in the queue behind them – yes, you guessed it, Chris’s bag was over the weight limit!! So it was suitcases on the floor and golf balls and two pairs of size 11 Footjoys were thrown into my case with blatant disregard to the clean and pressed silk underwear that I had so lovingly packed earlier!
Then followed probably the daftest thing that Chris has ever said to me – picture the scene – it’s 5 in the morning, surrounded by airport cafés, I’m 20 stone and he utters the words “do you fancy some breakfast?” I’m sure you can imagine my response – and the breakfast was duly devoured.
It was after breakfast that I had the pleasure of meeting Mark Pearson, Chris’s coach. I was soon to find out that Mark is a great guy and such a knowledgeable coach with years’ of experience full time on the European Tour. He leaves no stone unturned, but what I liked most about Mark was his ability to know when to work hard and when a laugh was needed, but more of that later!
Following a short 2 hour flight into Prague, we picked up our hire car, as did Mark, and embarked on what should have been an hour’s drive to the course. The intention was that Mark, now accompanied by ex Walker Cup player Jordan Smith, would follow us to the course as Chris had been before and knew where he was going. Big mistake!
A short while into the journey and Chris checks his mirror and declares that we have lost Mark! As it transpires, we had not actually lost Mark; he had followed a black Volvo when we had turned off. As we pointed out when we met again, we were in a black VW golf and not a Volvo, to which he replied “ah well I knew there was a V in it!” After driving for a good 2 hours, and Chris stating that every road and its surroundings looked familiar, we finally found the course and it was game on! When I say game on, I actually mean let’s go to the place where Chris puts so much hard work in, the practice area. My first taste of carrying the Boss’s bag had begun, and boy what a weight he had in it – I’m sure he was quietly chuckling to himself as I threw the bag over my shoulder and let out a groan as if I had been winded by a pro boxer’s punch to the ribcage! So onto the busy range we went and what a joy it was for an amateur golfer like myself to see; Titleist Pro V1s by the thousands, all neatly stacked in their pyramids, like on the telly! Chris and Mark soon got to work with their fine tuning of Chris’s driving, which he had been blocking out to the right the previous weeks and not hitting as many fairways as he would like. I tell you no lie, within minutes of them chatting and using the aid of Trackman, Chris was nailing drive after drive like a missile, 300 yards plus – it was an absolute pleasure to watch two ultimate professionals at work. It was then that it became a caddy’s worse nightmare and the rain started to fall! Full use was soon to be made of the special Huddersfield Giants towel I had brought Chris, as I had to do a double take when he asked me to dry his balls before hitting them!! After a couple of hours’ practice it was to the first tee for 18 holes with Jordan. Chris seemed to be hitting the ball sweetly around the course, with the odd fine tune here and there from Mark, and it was quite strange at first for me to experience him hitting two balls all the time, but then I guess that it what these perfectionists do! The rain started to come down heavier and trying to keep the clubs dry was becoming a nightmare. Myself and Mark were huddled under one umbrella trying to stay a little bit dry whilst Chris just carried on relentlessly firing balls down the middle of the fairway and hitting green after green. We got to the 9th, which is by the clubhouse and there was that look amongst everyone as if to say, shall we go in now! This was definitely not the choice of Chris and on we went to the 10th tee. I suppose I should have known that to a man who learnt his trade on the heights of Crosland Heath, this Czech weather would be nothing to him. The back nine continued and fortunately the weather baited enough for Mark to remove his waterproofs. It was at this point that we discovered his waterproofs had a major leak around the zip area and the whole of his groin and crotch region was wet through, mirroring the look of a 4 year old boy who could not wait until he had got to the loo! The golf seemed to pale into insignificance then as Mark prayed that the early evening sun would dry out his embarrassing wet patch prior to entering the bar and receiving strange looks from the barmaids! Highly amusing from our point of view.
It was just after 6pm when we came off the course and it was straight to the hotel, via a few of Chris’s all familiar detours by now! Once we found the hotel, we had our first experience of the Czech Police as we saw the blue lights flashing in our mirror as we pulled into the car park. Having wound their window down and hearing Chris’s Yorkshire accent for all of 5 seconds, we were waved on as the police officers shook their heads and looked at each other in bewilderment as to what language we were actually speaking! The crime, we established, was stopping in a cycle lane, which apparently is an offence that can be punished by imprisonment in the Czech Republic!
A quick shower and change and we were back out again to meet Mark at a steak restaurant highly recommended by Chris. By this time my body was aching, my chubby ankles were even chubbier and my feet just did not feel like they belonged to me – a nice juicy steak was definitely what my athletic body required to aid its recovery to peak fitness! Unfortunately the steak was never to come that evening due to a long wait in the restaurant and it was to a local sports bar where we all ate the biggest meals on the menu, washed them down with a few pints (Chris on water) and all for the price of £8 each!!
So it was back to the hotel and straight to reception for two totally different requests. Chris wanted a kettle so he could have his beechams and other medicines to help fight off the manflu. I purchased 6 chocolate bars, 2 packets of crisps and a bottle of red wine to keep me company in my room! Spot the athlete, eh!!
Wednesday 27 May 2015
This was the day of the Pro-am competition at the course, which Chris was not participating in and so it was a leisurely start to the day with breakfast at the hotel and then a short walk to Tesco’s to stock up on our essentials. Now I am a big guy who has been known to enjoy his food in the past, but let me tell you that despite his tall slender figure, Chris has one hell of an appetite when playing golf and probably eats something every third hole! It was at Tesco’s that I learnt of Chris’s addiction to cereal bars, as they were piled in the basket. Whilst in Tesco, Chris asked a shop assistant where the shower gel was – quite innocent I hear you think. The next minute the girl was crying uncontrollably and could still be heard sobbing with her head in the toothpaste shelving as we scurried away, probably being the victims of the Czech lady’s PMT!
It was then to the course to do a day of practice. A straightforward journey of 15 minutes you would think, seeing as we had already been and Chris knew the way – how wrong could you be!! Following a couple of wrong turnings again, came a moment when my life flashed before my eyes. We were going around a roundabout when 15 yards in front of us was another car. The other car however was heading towards us – we were going the wrong way around the roundabout! A quick application to the brakes, and a swerve to the right and we came to a halt inches away from solid bollards which no doubt would have put an end to my boyish good looks! We sat stationary for a moment, made a few expletives, checked my trousers for lumps and then the relief of the situation made us just laugh like schoolboys! Not long after this we received a call from Mark informing us that his car had a flat battery and could we help him out. So another diversion to Mark’s hotel and there he stood, a lonely figure staring at his hire car in bewilderment. What followed next was something like a scene from Benny Hill, as a tour professional and his caddy pushed the coach and his small hired Skoda up and down the car park, risking injury and near death in an attempt to get him mobile again! I did wonder at one point whether Tiger Woods and Steve Williams had ever performed a similar feat for Butch Harmon, but then again Tiger was probably always otherwise engaged in his hotel room!
Despite the combined weight of 40 stone getting the Skoda up to speeds of 30mph, Mark still failed to jump start the little beauty and our rescue mission had failed. We all then decided to head to the course and wait for a call from the breakdown company.
At the course we headed straight for the short game area and off I went collecting balls and ensuring “The Boss” never went short. It was fascinating to watch how Chris and Mark made short game and putting practice so much fun by the creation of games and contest. On the putting green especially, there were boxes, lines and string being strewn all across the green in an effort to make the monotony interesting. Quite frankly, it is not difficult to understand how Chris plays to the standard that he does with the hours and hours of practice that he puts in, he is like a machine!!
Due to other commitments, we said our goodbyes to Mark in the afternoon, as he headed to the airport for an early morning flight the next day. I can honestly say it was a pleasure to meet you and see you at work Mark, a thought that I am sure was echoed by Chris. During the 7 hours that we were at the course, we stopped only once for a snack and a coffee before Chris headed off for a drugs awareness talk issued by the Tour to all players. This was an opportunity that I was not going to miss, and I headed for the car, reclined the seats and snoozeland was well and truly visited!
Drugs talk done and it was back to the hotel, quick shower, check in with the loved ones and back into town to visit the steak restaurant that we had all salivated over last night. This time we struck lucky and the restaurant was able to accommodate us. My oh my, how you missed a beautiful steak Mark, but at least we had the decency to send you a picture of it!
Thursday 28 May 2015
Well, it has finally arrived; the first day of the tournament and time to put all that preparation to use. An afternoon tee time meant that it was a nice leisurely start and I met Chris at breakfast in the now famous yellow jersey of “Team Hanson” in an effort to chill him out and think of last year’s success in The Open.
We headed on down to the course and for the first time on tour we arrived at our destination with no dramas or detours – things were definitely looking up!
After Chris had registered, it was straight to the practice area for his usual hard work and routine. The place itself had a definite buzz about it now and was completely different to practice days previously. The hospitality tents were buzzing and the players seemed to be a lot less relaxed and “zoning in” on the challenge that lay ahead. My thoughts were the opposite of this and although this was serious stuff for Chris, I felt it was my job to keep his mood light-hearted and relaxed. Obviously for those of you that know me, this wasn’t a problem and many gags and relaxation methods came from me, although I did stop short of offering him a massage!
It was then time to head for the 10th tee which was our starting hole. At the tee I was presented with my caddie’s bib which I pulled on with great pride although at first a little hesitancy, hoping that it would fit over my fuller figure!! Fortunately the bib had adjusters on the side and there was no drama there and Chris then handed me what could only be described as an old fashioned cross of an algebra and Pythagoras theory booklet, known in the trade as yardage book and pin positions! Now even though I am a single figure golfer, this was taking things to another level – it had precise measurements to mounds, bunkers and everything else you could think of, with the exception of animal droppings!
Introductions on the tee were made and it was a straightforward 3 wood for Chris which just rolled off the fairway and into the right hand side semi rough. He was left with around 150 yards to the pin and took a 9 iron into the green. Unfortunately he got a flier and to make it worse hit a downslope on the green which sent the ball through the green into knee high grass. The ball was barely visible for his third shot and needless to say we walked off my first hole on tour with a triple bogey 7! Walking to the next tee I was thinking to myself, ok what on earth do I say to “the Boss” after that start? I chose to say nothing, as did Chris for the next 5 minutes until we were walking down the fairway on the 11th and he looked across at me and said, “well, that wasn’t the best start was it!”. We both smiled and chuckled to ourselves and the ice was broken again and it was back to business.
The rest of the round was a pretty mixed bag and despite driving the ball beautifully, the longer putts were just not dropping. I spent a lot of time raking bunkers and at times felt like sandals would have been the more appropriate footwear as opposed to trainers! It was all worth it however as Chris made so many sand saves it was an absolute pleasure to watch – that part of his game is amazing.
One thing to be aware of with Chris is his special drinks that he has the caddy carry around for him. I’m presuming it’s some sort of rehydration liquid but one thing is for sure, do not put it in the bag near your body. I had the misfortune of having the drink in a bottle close to my rear. After a few holes into the round, I heard a fizzing and felt wetness around my backside. Wondering what it was and in a panic that I hadn’t done anything embarrassing, I reached round to feel a giant wet patch on my bum. Chris chuckled and said “oh yeah, I forget to mention that the drink fizzes and flies out of the top at times” – thanks, Boss!
So as we trudged off the 18th green, hot, sweaty and at +4, the mood between us could have been better, it is fair to say! All that changed in a nano second when The Boss went to the bar and brought me an ice cold beer and best of all it was a free bar! There were no other words that a bald headed, sweaty, fat caddie could have wanted to hear more! After a few pints and feeling rather comfortable, Chris ruined my relaxation by deciding that he was in need of more practice and so off we went to the practice area again! An hour or so later, it was back to the car and subsequently the hotel. It was straight to my room, soak my feet, rest my heavy legs and I was sleeping like a baby.
Friday 29 May 2015
Day two of the competition, and as is pretty standard on the tour, it was an early start for us due to being out late in the first round. As the sun rose over the square outside our hotel, we were up and away to the course. We both knew deep down that it was going to take something out of this world to make the cut, but one thing you can never say about Chris is that he gives up and doesn’t have the belief.
A quick breakfast in the clubhouse, 40 minutes’ practice, and we headed to the 1st tee. The starter’s hut at the 1st was laden with bananas, water and cereal bars, which I duly stuffed into the bag to just make sure that I had everything that the Boss may need during the round. I must admit that I chuckled to myself as I put the items in the bag, as it was probably the first time I had ever handled a banana or cereal bar – my usual source of nutrition on the course is chocolate bars, pork pies and a hip flask! The 1st hole was a regulation par for Chris, but then on the 2nd he stiffed his 3rd to the par 5 from 80 yards and bang – we were up and running! Another 6 birdies followed with only one bogey, as we stood on the par 5 16th, a hole that these guys are always looking to make birdie. It was now at the forefront of my mind that the unexpected could actually happen and we would make the cut. A decent drive just rolled off the left side of the fairway, but Chris was in good position to reach the long green in two and set up eagle/birdie chance. He selected rescue club, but to our dismay, pushed it out right and into the water. His next ended up in the sand and the ball was nestled into the face of a 4ft deep bunker at the side of the green. The only option I could see was to play sideways and backwards but what followed simply amazed me. Maybe thinking that he had nothing to lose, Chris took a full swing and out flew the ball to a foot. Believe me, if that shot had been played by one of the world’s best, it would be seen on TV for many, many years to come. He sunk the short putt and it was an absolutely outstanding bogey, if ever that could be said, and just kept us in with an outside chance. Unfortunately 2 pars on 17 & 18 followed and Chris had carded a fantastic round of 67. Unfortunately, this did not take us through to the next day despite it being the third lowest score of the entire tournament!
After Chris had signed for his score, we sat down on the patio of the bar area and just settled into a nice cold beer. Chris, as usual, had his head in his phone and I was quite happy sitting with my beer, resting my now swollen ankles and tired feet. After a couple of sips, Chris looked across and said “fancy going home today?”. I had the idea that we would have a couple of beers, go back to the hotel and tootle on to the airport in Prague, so I said “sure, what times the flight?”. 4 o’ clock was the reply and it was now 13.30! We thought, let’s exactly try do it and a mad rush to the hotel, pack bags and 100 mph speeds to Prague airport, got us to the plane with 10 minutes to spare!!
A few hours later and we had landed in Manchester. Those of you still following this might be thinking, Manchester? They flew from Leeds/Bradford? You would be quite right in thinking that, and this is where “Supermum”, Mrs Hanson comes in. She was there to greet us at the airport and take us back home, where Chris would then run me to Leeds/Bradford airport for my car. One final funny thing that shows the difference between Chris and myself was how I had been longing to have a special mixed kebab on naan for supper when I got home. As he went in his house for the car keys to take me back for my car, he walked out of the house munching an apple! It’s food like that which makes me glad I have no talent and no chance of making it as a Pro! A short drive to collect my car, we said our goodbyes and my caddying experience on the tour was over.
Finally, I would just like to thank Chris for allowing me the experience. It was one that I shall never forget and sincerely hope to be asked to do again some time. Chris is forever the ultimate professional and what surprised me most was the hard work, practice and determination that he demonstrates in such a difficult profession. He is also a family man who dotes on his wife Laura, and children Jess and Olivia, taking every spare moment of his life on tour to contact them by whatever means are possible. I have no doubt in saying that Chris will make it on the main tour very shortly and all his hard work and dedication will be justly rewarded!
Thanks for everything pal!
Gary Shuttleworth (The Looper)